relocation!

ive taken a job in macau, an SAR of China, and have been here a little over a week now. exciting stuff!

so i thought i would take the time to outline some major PROS and CONS of macau ((as i see it)(at this stage)) in case you are ever headed to south china yourself

PRO -- everyone is rich!

seriously rich. literally the majority of cars on the road are luxury and recent european models. everyone has at least one high-tech device on them at all times, even very young children, and everyone dresses nice. even the government has more money than it can spend so elaborate public works and art projects are all over the place, and every year the citizens receive a free 8000MOP each. (i think 8000, something in that area anyway). accordingly, there is very little crime in macau. basically zero; the only thing crime related ive seen or heard about are signs on busses warning about pickpockets and you can walk anywhere and feel safe.

CON -- it is crowded

big time crowded. in fact, macau is the most densely populated city on earth, and it shows. every bit of available space is taken up by apartment buildings or casinos. there are five ongoing land reclamation projects, all intended to drive out the ocean so more apartment blocks and casinos can be built. no matter where you go or what time of day it is, you can rest assured that other ppl will be there. it isint the worst thing per se, but it can definitely feel a bit overwhelming at times.

PRO -- food

there must be at least one restaurant for every 100spm, and they seem to all be delicious and affordable. in addition there is an amazing variety, thanks in large part to the portuguese colonial heritage.

CON -- some aspects of chinese culture are damn strange

forget about toilet paper in bathrooms or free cold water in bars and cafes, you have to carry all that shit around with you. and, apart from the newer areas, every single window (EVERY SINGLE ONE) is barred. this is one of the strangest things for sure. apparently it is to deter spiderman-esque criminals, but seeing as how there is no longer any crime to speak of i really would have thought the bars would be removed by now.

because whenever you look out a window, even the tiny ones in stairwells or bathrooms, you peer out through heavy-duty bars. don't underestimate the psychological impact this can have. even if you don't mind feeling like a prisoner in your home (or the fact that the older sections of the city just look like a gigantic prison) you may start to wonder how these bars might affect your survival chances in the case of fire, especially seeing as only the most modern buildings are equipped with fire escapes.

additionally, it is not customary in china to smile except when you know the other person well. even cashiers in shops and restaurants will not smile or even make eye contact (and you can forget about strangers), and if you push past somebody on the street (or are pushed past) there is no expectation that a cursory apology be given. this too has the cumulative effect of making the city seem far more hostile than it really is.

PRO -- you can get anywhere quickly

the city is beyond tiny so getting around can be pretty simple so long as you know where you're headed. also there are busses galore, and they're cheap as hell

CON -- shitty goddamn motherfucking humidity

according to wikipedia:

Humidity is the amount of water vapor in the air. Water vapor is the gas phase of water and is invisible.^[1] Humidity indicates the likelihood of precipitation, dew, or fog. Higher humidity reduces the effectiveness of sweating in cooling the body by reducing the rate of evaporation of moisture from the skin.

now it sounds straightforward enough there, but in reality, humidity is the worst single thing that ever has existed or ever will be. the wiki conveniently forgets to mention this. for much of my bachelor's degree i studied war crimes, genocide and conflict exclusively and let me just tell you: nothing throughout mankind's history is nearly as bad as high levels of humidity. if you were to be gang-raped to death while simultaneously being burned alive and castrated, that in all seriousness would not be as bad as being an inland australian spending twenty minutes in 100% humidity. you can castrate and burn me any day.

forget about doing anything during the day. forget about eating during sunup, or sleeping comfortably at night. ppl will tell you "oh, you'll adjust!" but i've spent seven straight days plus in the soup and, if anything, it's getting worse. if you are unused to humidity, simply do not come here. just don't. i'm here for five months, and that's ok, it's fun to be here, but i know there is no way in hell i will stay a day longer than that. it really is that bad. if you are unused to it then the humidity here will change you body and soul, and the fact that hundreds of thousands of ppl all around you are totally fine with it does not help at all. 

PRO -- the city itself and many of it's inhabitants are beautiful

the city is dotted with fascinating old churches and forts, the fancy casinos are very impressive and the girls are pretty cute on average. and thanks to the astounding humidity (see above) the gardens are lush and healthy looking.

CON -- societal disregard for nature

you know all that stuff you hear about pollution in china all the time; it's completely true (and here is relatively unpolluted compared to the mainland). the sky is blue only from time to time, the river that dissects the city is dirt brown and full of rubbish. there isint even any recycling, not at all, instead all the rubbish is incinerated. you can even forget about seeing even the usual dirty city animals. in the time ive been here i've seen a single snail, a single seagull, a single bat and one million cockroaches.

PRO -- it isin't australia

it's really something to be in a country not totally consumed with xenophobia and greed for once. at least the people of macau have the decency to admit that they have it nice, rather than pretend they are "struggling" on 200 000AUD a year. seriously, what are you idiots doing down there. macau is a pretend democracy (although you could argue australia is too) and yet they nevertheless have a national dialogue based in reality rather than one revolving around the threat posed by "boat ppl" and the supposedly prohibitively high cost of providing modern internet.

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so in conclusion, macau is really very nice in many ways but has some major drawbacks (especially for an inland westerner). additionally, fuck you australia because each day i'm more and more ashamed to tell ppl where i come from (they KNOW about the idiocy up here guys, they all know)